Hey peeps.  Its been a while.  And along with not writing, I also haven’t been reading.

Friday, Hubby and I left the boys with my parents for their first official sleep over.  (There was one other time but it began at like 10pm andended at 7am)  We left them around 2pm andI got back around 4pm on Saturday.  We took a little mini R&R at a local resort to celebrate our 9thanniversary.  Then I dropped hubby off at the airport so that he could spendthe next week with he family in San Antonio.  His baby sister is graduating from highschool this week.  The boys andI are spending the week with my family and just chilling.  My sister and her hubby andbaby are still living with my parents, so its been a full house.  But in a good way.  They should be moving into their apartment this week though.

We had a big week last week.  In terms of break through for J, we made some big leaps.  We went to the children’s museum with friends and J andthe 7 year old had a few moments of sustained, focused reciprocal play.  Also B WANTED to play with J andwas EXCITED to play with him.  We see B a few times a week in bible class andhome group settings.  BUT usually there is one or 2 other boys around that B is closer to in age andinterests so J just does his own thing.  Little J played with the younger girls of the family and we stayed at the museum over 2 hours.  This is about double the time that we normally stay.

Also, at the new rental house, we have in ground sprinklers that the boys have asked to be turned on nearly every day.  I bought a wading pool, filled it, and added a slide and we’ve turned the yard into a mini waterpark.  J who hates water in his face has spent 30 minutes at a time sliding into the pool with water splashing over him.  AND ENJOYING IT!  He wasn’t freaking out, he just wiped his face and did it again.  Yesterday we went to a friend’s house in my parents’ neighborhood to enjoy their in groundpool.  J spent the first 1/2 hour hanging out by the steps.  However, by the time we left he was swimming the length of the pool with out assistance from an adult (wearing a floatation body suit).  This is also huge, as he normally won’t go into water where he can’t touch the bottom. 

Things are going well.  We only have one more month until school starts.  His Occupational Therapists made the final transition on Wednesday.  He is doing well with the new one for the first half hour but starts to flake for the 2nd one.  I am going to give it a few more weeks before deciding what the cause is (time of day, medication, new therapist?)  HE’s only been going 2 months and has made great strides.  Last week his new therapist invited a new patient working with another therapist to join J for cooperative play on the swing.  He was a pro at the swinging and was able to give the girl tips to help her since she was at square one, where he used to be.  It was adorable and heart warming and amazing to see him be supportive of her while waiting his turn to do his favorite activity. 

So many people have commented lately about the changes they have seen in him.  I must store up these words and the things I write in my blogs to bolster me up on the days when it seems like nothing has changed.

if not to embarrass your children?

I’m not having a good month, despite all the good things happening so I thought I’d cheer us all up with a picture post.

Little J is learning the fne art of getting dressed from his brother.  Remeber this?

Who needs shorts when a shirt will cover you just fine?

And tighty whities are not just for “under wear” now. 

They make a lovely head covering as well as a base for costmume time…

End of embarassement.  I’m off to fight the ant wars before bed.  They think they own my kitchen!

This one has been floating around, and I’ve enjoyed reading all of yours.  Last week I was tagged by Emily at A Life Less Ordinary to do this.  As I left in her comments, I didn’t even know about her blog, much less that she read mine. So I am flattered.  (I just went and checked her comments and it isn’t there, so either it didn’t go through or she chose not to publish it.  But I have left comments for several of you lately and gotten all sorts of errors.  I forget to come back and try again. )

And now I will quit being busy/lazy to do this.

5 Things found in your bag

1. A diaper.  Little J is still not potty trained but I refuse to carry a diaper bag anymore, so I have a pretty pink purse and a diaper stuffed inside.

2. Assorted army men of the plastic non-posable variety.  These are for waiting rooms.

3. Small pink makeup bag containing hand sanitizer, carmex, lotion, and crayons.  Necessities, of course.

4. Box of Raisins and bag with gluten free snacks.  For when the munchies attack the kids

5. Stride Gum.  I love this stuff!

5 Favorite Things in your room.

(I’ll go with the living room since that is where I am)

1. Little J and J.

2. T.V., DVR, DVD player.  I LOVE TV and movies.

3. Laptop - DUH

4. Fish - so relaxing to watch

5. My rabbit named Ginger.  She is so soft its like petting air.  AND she is litterbox trained.

5 things you have always wanted to do

1. Get a degree in technical theater

2. Take a tour of Europe

3. See a play in England and on Broadway

4. Go on a Disney Cruise (not going to happen since hubby gets motion sick just looking at a boat)

5. Ride in a hot air balloon

5 things you are currently into

1. Sleep

2. Staying cool in the AZ heat

3. Trolling Craigslist and yard sales for bargains

4. Other people’s blogs

5. Finding balance for my fish tank

I’m not tagging peeps.  Every who I read that I know reads this, has already done this or been tagged to do it.  I live in a small blog circle right now.  So if you read and I don’t know it (cause you’ve never commented before) and you want to do it, leave me a comment so I can tag you.  I know, I know, not very good incentive to leave me a comment.  Do it anyway!

Oh wait….

Tracy over at The Fairy Castle hasn’t done this.  So consider yourself Tagged!

CORN FLAKES!

Yes I made the nuggets.  I couldn’t let yesterday’s corn dog oil go to waste.

I nixed the rice crackers from previous attempts.  I think the nuts in the crackers were giving them an odd aftertaste.

So today I used Chicken tenders and cut them in half (the boys nayed the idea of check fingers and I was NOT cutting them up tiny like last time!)  2.5 lbs of chicken

rice flour

corn flakes blended

1 thick slice of frozen homemade bread

2 eggs + a little milk

Skillet full of vegetable oil

They came out really pretty unlike before.  they were light and fluffy and tasted pretty good.  Now I just need to figure out what kind of spices to add to this mix so they aren’t quite so bland.  I have to cater to both ends of the taste buds with the little guys.

I simultaneously (while being careful not to contaminate) made macaroni (quinoa and corn elbows) with homemade Velveeta cheese sauce.

The kids loved dinner and I had plenty of both to freeze for later meals.

Today was J’s monthly Psychiatrist appt.  Since he has had so much anxiety about the bus and it has manifested as aggression, we decided to up one of his meds.  We also made the decision to start him on Melatonin.  He has been having a really hard time getting to sleep and then staying asleep for a while now.  So far, so good.  He didn’t get out of bed once he got in tonight.  Lately he has been in and out for up to 2 hours past bed time.  then he gets up in the middle of the night and changes where he sleeps (moves to a random couch in the house.)  Then to top off the lack of sleep, he has been waking up 1-2 hours earlier than normal.  I decided to go with the time release melatonin…..I’ll let you know the results of day one tomorrow.  Too early to tell right now.

Its weird being a military family. 

I was never “homesick” growing up.  I usually went away somewhere every summer at-least.  It wasn’t until I went on a 6 week mission trip to Honduras the summer between graduation and college that I got homesick.  Being in a foreign country will do that to you.  that and I had plans that fell through while I was there so I felt useless for a few weeks.  AND I was moving from Texas to Michigan to go to college.  Well college began a long line of homesickness.  I got married after my first year and we moved to Idaho, then 4 months later to Guam.  It was crazy because there was a 16 hour difference so due to costs of long distance and never a good time to call, I had to stay in touch via impersonal email.  When we moved to MA a year later we got cell phones and it was great to be able to call my mom more often.  Especially when we had J and I became a Stay at home mom.  My younger sister moved in with us for about 6 months at one point (before I was even preggers) and I kind of liked it.  I liked having family around for the 1st time in 3 years.  Then she moved away for a year and came back again.  Then moved away again. 

When we moved to NV we were away from everyone again.  My parents managed to come out for both Christmas’s we lived there.  Then after 25 years my dad left TX and took a job in AZ 2 years ago this June.  We got pretty excited.  they were only 5 hours away.  We could see each-other on Holiday weekends.  Then that August Hubby got orders to go to an 8 month school in Mississippi and on to an undisclosed base.  After being in school a few weeks we found out that we were headed to Tucson.  This is only 75 minutes from my parents.  We couldn’t believe our fortune.  Our kids would get to know their grandparents.  We would get to have family around, not to mention the free babysitters

While we were in MS, my sister was in Missouri.  She found a guy and they got married last January.  We all met in TX for the wedding as it was sort of equal distance from all of us.  We thought we would see her again this past Christmas at my parents but it just didn’t work out.  She had a baby in September and all sorts of other things happened.  Anyway, it was kind of up in the air as to when we would ever see each other again.  Each of our hubbies gets limited vacation time and it has to be spent visiting certain people.

So She came out last weekend with the baby to my parents’ house unexpectedly.  Now this weekend her hubby is coming.  His job situation sucked in MO and so did the family situation.  So they are MOVING to AZ!!!  I really never thought that my whole family would be close to us again.  When I married hubby I thought that my parents would be in TX for the rest of forever.  There weren’t any possible bases near them.  We love my parents so much that my hubby would buy the house next door to them if it wasn’t an over an hour commute to work.  I love my sister.  My 6 month old niece is adorable and Little J has started bonding with her. 

So after almost 9 years of marriage, we are all together.  It was fun before with my cousin and her family that live just north of my parents, its even better having my sister here to share it all with us.  I know most military families are not so blessed.  We will have to move away from them eventually, but for now I’m going to enjoy it.

:)  Smiling ear to ear now.

Treasure in the challenge

– Ralph Marston

I had this email forwarded to me.  Who doesn’t like something free? and musical to boot.  not to mention educational.

For children with special needs:

The Come Children Sing Institute is offering free gift certificates for Come Children, Sing! Online Music Classes for infants, babies and toddlers with special needs.  The $35 gift certificate will provide one 10-week Online Music Class.  Request a free gift certificate for your child by sending an email to
mepinzino@comechildrensing.com.  Mention this message and that
you have a child with special needs. Your gift certificate will
be sent via email and you can start the Online Music Class at
any time.

Come Children, Sing! is a developmental music program that
makes learning music as natural as learning language.  You can
now engage with your little one in music classes online, in
your own home and on your own schedule, whatever your musical
background, and whatever the developmental level of your
child.  MP3 files, music activities, and parent tips are all
provided online, and you can make Come Children, Sing! portable
with an iPod or CD.

For further information and to view free sample lessons of Come
Children, Sing! Online Music Classes for infants, babies and
toddlers, go to www.comechildrensing.com.

Mary Ellen Pinzino, Director
Come Children Sing Institute
P.O. Box 1202
Homewood, IL 60430
Tel: 708/957-SING!
Fax: 708/957-7464

www.comechildrensing.com

Today I started my new playgroup for parents of special needs kids.  I don’t have any members yet, but I will.  I use a platform called meetup.com and they send out announcements of new groups 72 hours after they have started.  I am grateful for the experience I have gotten this past year organizing a group of military moms.  I plan to continue with this group but I wanted to add something more specific in our lives for J.  I currently plan most of my schedule around when he will be in school.

I am a shy person by nature but I can be very out going in situations I can control.  So even though I said I would join one of the local support groups before forming my playgroup, I am just to chicken to do so.  Maybe once I meet people through my message board, then in person, we can go to a support group meeting together.  Honestly I need a support group for attending support groups but I probably wouldn’t go to that either. :{

Really if I can just find one or two other moms who I can relate to and who have kids that get along with mine (that’s been a problem lately) I’ll count it as a success.  I am not out there to form a mega group but will do whatever I can to help it grow at a healthy rate.  I’ll keep you updated.

If you are looking for a playgroup in your area check out Meetup.com and search by zip code.  when I was getting up the courage to start my group I looked around and there are lots of meetups in the states.  Most are called “Parents of special needs kids in *your city name here*”  I asked some friends for ideas to give mine an original name and they came up with “M.O.M.S.  = Moms of Many Spectrums”.  I like it.

Not a day goes by when I don’t wonder if medicating my child is the right way to go.  He has been diagnosed with Autism, ADHD, Severe Separation Anxiety, and Sensory issues.  He is taking medications for ADHD and Anxiety.  The very first set of meds he was on in October did nothing, but he was far worse when he was off of them.  This set of meds, doses since beginning of December, have made some huge differences.  His teachers comment all the time on how much progress he has made and how much they enjoy having him in class.  People at church stop me and tell me they are noticing a change in him.  Still, Some days are hard and make me question if it is the meds or the training creating the difference.  But days like this past Friday remind me that it is the right choice for our family.

Some how I forgot to give him his meds in the morning.  When I went to pick him up from school a few kids came out before him and the teachers mentioned to the other parents that it had been a hard day for all the kids in the class.  Then J came out.  His lead teacher told me that it had been a rough day.  He constantly needed to be redirected, he had a few meltdowns, and he really couldn’t focus.  His teachers were chalking it up to post-Valentines sugar rushes.  It was at that point that I remembered he hadn’t had his meds.  We really needed to go to the store for pull-ups and diapers, but Little J fell asleep in the car.  So I dropped Little J off at home in his bed, hubby is on Mids so he was home, and J and I headed off to the store.  While we were there he continually asked for a toy, normal for a 4 year old but he took it to another level.  He started lashing out trying to hit me.  so I put him in the cart and he kept climbing out while we were moving.  He repeated the word “toy” like an angry mantra.  then while we were looking at grownup books (I needed to pick one for book club) he saw the fruit cups and changed from “toy” to “fruit.”  Now I may have bought the fruit if it wasn’t for the anger and hitting and the fact that we had some at home.  I decided we were done.  Unfortunately I couldn’t leave without the stuff in the cart so we went to check out.  He continued to lash out and almost fell out of the cart.  the cashier was trying not to stare, but did tell him if he didn’t sit down he would fall out.  I was trying my best to keep out of arm’s length and ignore his “fruit” diatribe because engaging him when he is stuck on a loop does more harm than good.  When we got to the car and I buckled him in he was still very angry.  By the time I started the car and looked in the mirror, silent tears were falling on his cheeks.  I felt horrible because I knew it was partly my fault.  I should have given him his meds and I should have fed him before taking him to the store (he is extra cranky when his blood sugar is low.)  I debated giving him meds when we got home but I felt like it was too late, plus he needed a nap and he can’t take ADHD meds before sleeping.  When he woke up he was still in a super bad mood, unfocused, and just not himself.  Luckily in the cabinet I have the old dosage which is 1/2 of the current one so I gave him his meds.  Within 40 minutes he was J again.  It kicked in sometime during dinner.

So after that day, I realized our choices are truly justified.  One day like that in 2.5 months is one day too many.  If he wasn’t on meds, I would need to be.  My nerves were completely frazzled and I’m sure I owe his teachers an apology, they are saints.

I have to start this with a disclaimer.  I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.  I don’t think the sun should be up until 9am.  Right now our bedroom is extra dark because hubby has been alternating between days and mids (11pm -7am) shifts so he often has to get a good night’s sleep in the middle of the day.

On a normal day Little J wakes me up between 6:30 and 7am wanting a banana.  this has been going on for so long that I now keep one on my bedside table.  Most of the time he crawls into my bed and eats it and then goes back to sleep for an hour or so.  When he is awake for good he goes to the fridge and gets a piece of cheese or a yogurt and eats.  He is usually in and out of my room every 15-20 minutes talking or asking for something so even though I am in bed I can’t sleep. 

J usually wakes up between 8:00-9am and sits on the couch watching TV until he is too hungry and comes and asks for breakfast.

I am generally on my feet by 8:30am at the latest (usually earlier, but not this week) so I often beat J out of bed.

Today he was up before me and before Little J had gotten out of my bed.  He came and asked for some fruit so I told him he could have 20 grapes from the fridge.  (when I was a kid, my mom would tell us the same thing, but I’d always pop a few in my mouth before counting.  J is so literal that I am pretty sure he got exactly 20)  Then he played in the hallway right outside my door.  He got a little noisy so I asked him to shut my door, and he did.  When Little J woke up hungry, I asked J to get him 20 grapes also.  He did so very kindly.  then he came back and told me that Little J was sharing his grapes with him and that it was very nice.  A few minutes later, Little J was in the playroom asking for the movie that was looping on the title menu.  I yelled for J and asked him to push play.  Again he was in a very helpful mood.

I finally got up at 8:55 when J started begging for eggs.  Normally I’d not fix eggs on a weekday, but He was so helpful this morning, with a really positive attitude.  They were loving towards eachother.  Too bad it didn’t last past 9am.  That’s when the teasing, taunting and stealing began.  But at least I was well rested so I could deal with it.

I don’t usually stay in bed when both of them are awake because trouble brews, so today was a treat.  J being independent was a blessing.