Snot on my scrubs

If I worked in a traditional medical office, snot on my scrubs would probably be normal. But I’m an office manager in an eye clinic. Snot is not a part of my day.

Today is the first day back to school after a 2 week spring break. J woke up today adamant that he was no longer going to school. He barely got dressed after putting pajama pants on instead of clothes first. He didn’t eat breakfast. He tried to leave without shoes or me before I was ready. He decided taking a backpack was too much work.

When I got him to school with a lunch box that also contained some breakfast and his binder, he didn’t want to get out of the car. I explained that I had to work and if i don’t make money, he doesn’t get food or fun stuff. So he got out of the van and nearly kicked his binder into the way of on coming traffic.

I stayed in the van watching but it seemed that he was really agitated and being verbally abusive to the parapros who were there with him. So I pulled out of the drop off line and into a parking spot. I went up to hug him (deep sensory input)  and he blew his nose on my scrubs.

I ended up having to walk him in to school. We compromised on going to a life skills room instead of class. I basically left him with hi low expectations. No fit throwing today so you can have electronics time. Electronics time means he can spend his money on Amazon. I told him he’s allowed to feel the way he feels about school but he’s not allowed to act badly about it.

On my way out, I ran into another mom on the sidewalk who I know from special Olympics. She was trying to coach her son to go into his classroom from across the lawn. We acknowledged that it was a rough morning for all of us, a few tears escaped, and I hugged her. We walked out of the school together, hopeful that our kids navigate this Monday well.

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And the award goes to….

ME!

Best Mom Ever!

When the boys grumble or complain about something I’ve done or made for them, I usually reply with, “I’m sorry, I think you meant to say, ‘Thanks mom, you’re the best mom ever'”

Yesterday they each said it on their own, in separate instances, without prompting, for something they were genuinely grateful for.

I couldn’t ask for a better reward.

(I’m writing this now as a reminder since lightning might not strike twice…or at least soon.)

Oops

I have an addiction to fuzzy socks. Many of them are striped, purple, or striped and purple. I think this falls under the category, “close enough.”  Sadly, I thought they were a match when I grabbed them from the laundry this morning. One of my favorite quotes is,  “life’s too short to find matching socks.” My mom likes to remind me that in junior high, my friends and I would compete to have the most outrageously mismatched pair.

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A miracle day

I worked half a day today. I told the boys last night that they would have some responsibilities to take care of while I was gone. When I left for work, I left a checklist of chores plus thier rooms to clean. Last night before bed, J started on his room all on his own. Little j was busy in his when I woke up. When I got home, they were making their lunches and that wasn’t even on the check list. All their chores were done and their rooms were age appropriately cleaned. Then I found out that J helped little j with one of his jobs because they were worried I’d be home before he could finish.

Now they are outside playing chase/hide and seek/cap guns together.

If I ignore the fact that J was sneaking electronics at 430 am, I’d call it a perfect day.

Patience

J loves to say, “you know patience isn’t my strong suit. ”

Today I’m empathetic. Unfortunately I think what I usually say back to him is, “I know it’s not but you have to be patient anyway. ”

Trying to keep my mind off the things that have a longer timeline today.

Comic relief

Little j is naturally funny. Especially when he isn’t trying to be.
It is red ribbon week at school and every day has a theme. He was especially excited about mustache day. He let me draw one on with a blue marker. When I picked him up he told me that lots of kids had them drawn on but he thinks he was the only one with blue. He also said he wished it was mustache day everyday so that he could choose different colors and styles to draw. I made him scrub it off just before our scout meeting. He says this is his serious mustache face.

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I’ve been trying to convince him it’s time for a hair cut. I think part of the reason he doesn’t want one is because he gets a kick out of styling it after his shower each night. Here’s his grease lightening/Elvis look.

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Too bad he can only get his hair to do fun stuff when it is wet. As it dries it gets crazy and he had no interest in styling products. Also, he takes night showers so his hair dries while he sleeps… Recipe for hilarity in the morning.

Nothing but real

I’ve heard it said a lot lately that people often compare their worst real life days to the best of someone else’s facebook. (which leads to low self esteem). I, however, aim to make you feel good about yourself. I don’t hide the bad stuff. Here’s my theory on that, if I’m having a rough day (usually with J ) I’m probably going to need your prayers. I’d rather have that than to “look like a perfect family. ” I don’t share all my (personal) lows, I’m not an open book. I don’t spend a lot of time dwelling on the events but I do put them out there.
•••••••Before I sat down to write this, I had dinner at my parent’s house. Thank goodness my dad and mom decided to cook some comfort food not even knowing what kind of day I’d  had. (biscuits and sausage gravy with warm chocolate pudding all from scratch)••••••••••
Today was one of those days. J and little j went to YMCA care since I had to work all day and didn’t have any one to watch them at home. This is the same care I used for both of them last year after school and this year for little j. This is the 3rd week of break. With that said, this is not a new place or situation for J. Today he didn’t want to go outside. He got physical with the staff, they restrained him, and then at some point he ran away. He ran around the school (where the YMCA operates) and eventually ran out the front gate and across the street.  I got a call when the incident was over to let me know he was fine and safe and calm. Then I got a call a couple hours later. The staff had called their supervisor and the supervisor said that if it happens again,  they had to call 911 because by the staff leaving the other kids it put them out of ratio. Most parents would be upset, I’m not. Here’s why, I can use that info to my advantage. When it was time to pick him up I told him about 911 bring called. I asked him what he thought would happen. He said he might go to jail. With further questioning he’s decided that he would rather not go to jail and that he doesn’t have money to pay for bail. I’m hoping that’s enough to scare him straight for Thursday.
Stop now if you don’t want TMI….

I hate that he reacted that way. It was in no way the right thing to do. Normally it would mean a stiff punishment. I’ve decided to go easy on him. He’s got some other stuff working against him. Poor kid has been cycling through constipation and diarrhea for a month. He gets backed up for several days and then it explodes out of him. The longer it takes the more his behavior spirals. I’ve been able to link his worst days in the last 4 weeks to the end of the constipation cycle. And his 2 worst of the worst have happened on the day before the full moon. He’s always been most agitated that day every month. This kid’s body is so sensitive that I don’t think his brain can process the emotions properly with his gut out of synch and the gravitational pull.
So we talked to his psych today, made a few minor changes, had an evening of no electronics and we are spending the night at my parents house with the intention of some fun in Phoenix tomorrow. Praying that Thursday he’ll be more himself and have a great YMCA day.

Something for everyone

This weekend we crammed as much variety into 48 hours as was possible. Friday night little j “camped ” in the backyard at Mrs S’s.

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Then we all met at the bowling alley for practice (Special Olympics ). Little j loves bowling but he has struggled to find a ball that is the right weight combined with the right finger sizes. He’s been bowling with a ball too heavy for him just to fit fingers in but then his thumb can’t reach. So I decided that if he agreed, I’d get him an early Christmas present. Originally I was going to get my Nana’s ball redrilled for him but it turned out to be too heavy. So the pro shop owner gave me a good deal and we got him a new ball.

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He loves it so much that he has been practicing in the living room.

After bowling, S and I took all the kids to Olive Garden. They all like pizza, pasta and bread sticks so it was a winning place. S and I got to indulge in grownup food too.

Our big surprise for the day was to take all the kids to the reptile and amphibian show being held at the Expo center. It was a big hit. J talked with several people about things he knew and he even learned a few new facts.

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We saw thousands of reptiles but J’s favorite area was the one with all the dangerous and venomous snakes. He had me take pictures of his favorites. He could tell me which book or movie he learned about the creature in and an interesting fact.
3 of the kids left with S to go to swimming practice. I kept the 3 who wanted to look at more creatures.

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We had a pact that no live animals would be coming home. I’m proud to say I was able to resist. It was definitely easy to say no to J’s requests for a baby green anaconda.

Sunday after church time we went to the local science center and planetarium.

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The boys played in the exhibits until the afternoon planetarium show started. It was a Magic Tree House adventure with Jack and Annie in space. They weren’t sure they’d like it but it was really cool in the planetarium dome. Afterwards, we went down to the marine discovery lab. J latched on to the college student running the lab and traded facts with her for quite awhile.
Sunday night I decided to be spontaneous and offered up bowling and pizza. Only little j wanted to go. So we asked some friends and headed out to the alley to play.

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We stayed way past the kids’ bedtime but we all had fun. I even managed to have some luck and not be completely terrible.

We still have one more week of fall break. I’m hoping for at least one more day of fun before school gets started again.